A couple of tirades and a thank you

1. To the person who made my sandwich: I wish I could have just told you that you are one crazy bitch to your face.
(background):
I asked for just "a little" cheese on my sandwich at Subway and the lady (?) threw a HANDFUL of cheese on it. I thought for about a second (should I say something, should I just take it as it is) but then I got mad, I specifically asked for just a little. Cheese has a tendency to bother my stomach a little. So I said to her "actually I just wanted a little cheese" to which she replied "I gave you only a little cheese"- what I wanted to say "if you consider that to be just a little cheese, maybe that is why you weigh 800 lbs"- instead what I said was "ok well I want less than that"- she huffed like I was wrestling her 8 morning twinkies away from her and just threw out the whole sandwich. I told her she didn't need to throw out the whole thing, just take off some cheese. She told me it was ruined.
Okayyyyyy.

2. To the people I work with: STOP coming in every 5 minutes asking if your paycheck is ready. Guess what, you technically shouldn't get them until tomorrow so the fact that we give them to you today should make you sit and WAIT until I call you to come in and get it!

3. To the 400 lb gorilla: if you complain about Quick books ONE MORE TIME, I am going to stuff you into one of our "machines"- luckily we have an "oversized" one specifically for that.

4. To the funeral director who came in today and farted when he sneezed: I am not sorry for laughing. I feel for you, that was embarrassing but come on, who wouldn't have laughed.

5. To the SOAP channel: THANK YOU SO MUCH for going back to Season 1 of Beverly Hills 90210- I can not tell you how good it feels to watch Brenda and Dylan fall in love all over again.