Congrats to

MBV aka "Brooke"!!!!
Officially a lawyer!
We knew you would do it!!!!!!
now go drink a lot around Columbus!!
:)

Bill don't look!!!!

So a lot of people have been asking me what my wedding dress looks like.
Because we are having a small, family only wedding, not many people will get to see it.
So I decided to show it to you all today.
I'm still up in the air about the veil- thoughts?

It's my d*ck in a box!

Everyone loves a box.
M especially loves this box.




I know I need to blog about things- especially my "something borrowed" granny panties...
Be patient my friends, be patient.
It's coming...
THATSWHATSHESAID!!!

:)
JAR/JAM aka "Beefeater"

You know what they say....

“Red sky at night, sailor’s delight. Red sky in morning, sailor’s warning”


This was the sky this morning:



I'd say a good foreshadowing for the weekend...there's a storm a brewin'...
HURRICANE JAR/JAM!!
:)

This weekend is my Bachelorette party (and Bill's Bachelor party).
He is headed down to Columbus and I am staying in Cleveland.
I am excited although I have no idea what the plans are.
MCD has taken over so I'm pretty confident we will have a great time!

Will Angry Johnny make it?
Will 80sBand vomit his Hyde Park dinner?
Will I lose 10lbs from sweating my arse off dancing?

Remains to be seen....

TGIF!

p.s. "Squeaks when you bang it...THATSWHATSHESAID!!!"
God Bless The Office...

Listen! Do you smell that?

(line from one of my favorite movies: Ghostbusters)

Anyhow first this:


1. Because I think it's funny
2. Because it's a good way to start this particular blog.

Everyone knows that Bill and I have 2 dogs- Jack Russell mix, and a pug.
I raised the pug.
Bill raised the JR.
Now we raise them together.
It was important that I point out that I raised the pug bc his level of discipline is quite different from that of the JR.
The pug has no discipline.
I got him at a point in my life where I was out drinking every night and working at the OG everyday and all I wanted to do when I came home was let him run around and act cute.
I am his bitch. There I said it.

That leads us to last night.

After we got home from the Capt D./MCD house (which was a GREAT TIME)- we got into bed and watched the end of the first game of the World Series.
JR was in his usual place under the covers.
I was laying on Bill getting my nightly head scratching (I am a lucky lady!).
Buster (the pug) was no where to be found.
His usual spot (my pillow) was empty.
I could not relax.
We turned the tv down and listened.
Sounds of snorting and breathing and licking were heard.
Buster was next to the bed, on the floor, licking my robe.
Sigh

Anyhow I got him back on the bed and he starting his nightly routine of getting settled by licking the pillow, my hand, whatever was close by.
I am used to this and let him do whatever he needs to do.
Bill gets icked out.
I understand.

Anyhow we got into a "discussion" about how Buster was so spoiled yada yada yada.
The next thing I know, Bill presents his punishment.
By way of smell.
A bad smell.
A horrible smell.
Tear to my eyes kind of smell.
I know you know what I am referring to here.

I tried my best to contain it by pushing all of the covers down.
He did his best to lift the covers and wave around the smell for total shock and awe of my nasal passage.

Point goes to Bill.

Meat good

Now that I've learned how to skin a deer, I decided that I might make a good hunter (or "huntress" or whatever).
I also decided that I need to spend my "free time" at work doing something a bit more educational.
So I downloaded "Oregon Trail".
I know you remember playing it.

Time to go shoot some meat for my family!!!

The company you (I) keep

I just spent the last 10 minutes on the computer looking up pigs' feet recipes for a guy I work with.

Cedar - full of freaks- Point

This past weekend I took my first trip to Cedar Point.
It was Bill, me, Brooke, and 80sBand.
AngryJ and Nutmeg girl were supposed to come along but AngryJ had to WORK- ugh.
Poor poor Nutmeg girl (we all thought you should have flown out anyway)...
:)

Cedar Point highlights:

- it was CROWDED. More crowded than Bill, Brooke, or 80sBand had ever seen before.

- Nutmeg girl assigned us the task of finding the best mullet. However, it didn't seem to be mullet day at the park...rather "I'm a freak teenager day" instead. Lip piercing seemed to be the way to go.

- Waiting in lines for the rides sucked, but we came up with fun ways to pass along the time. Including but not limited to: "Guess what instrument that freaky band kid plays", thinking of how to get more "normal people" (people like us) to the park by inventing new park promotions like "Only people with 401Ks can enter the park day"

-We only got to go on 3 rides: Magnum, Mean Streak, and Millenium Force.
Millenium Force was the first ride and I'm proud to say, I did NOT crap my pants. I did cry a little, but I'd like to say they were tears of joy. It was SUPER fun!!!!

- Probably the best highlight was when 80sBand saw someone famous!!
We were in line for the Mean Streak when 80sBand became quite excited. He informed us that "Jeff Daniels" was in line, just ahead of us. You know, the guy from Dumb and Dumber that isn't Jim Carrey.
We all turned to look but 80sBand quickly told us "don't look yet, you want to be able to see him from the front" and "to be patient"...
.....
.....
so we wait...
and we look....



and now I'll show a picture of the REAL Jeff Daniels bc this was obviously NOT him...





In conclusion, we had a really good time.
The weather was great.
80sBand pleased us all by remembering on every ride where the camera was and taking GREAT pictures (you know the ones where you get off the ride and there is some kind of hut place where all the screens of pictures from the ride are located).

Take 2

Dear Tony Romo,

Hi.
You said you were not going to play for 4 weeks.
So I picked up your back-up and was just starting to feel "ok" about this whole thing.
Then you decide to FUCK EVERYTHING UP AGAIN and announce that you'd like to play.
Well I'd like to shove a hot poker up your ass.

I hate you more than I did before.

JAR/JAM

Link of the Day

At the bottom of a website I was looking at was this amazing link to click on:



Special Instructions for Users Who Are Blind

Dear Tony Romo,

Hi.
You were my fantasy football QB.
You scored a lot of points for me.
I am #1 in my league.

Then you went and broke your finger.
I hate you.
I think you should go fuck yourself.

Sincerely,
JAR
Teamname: "Romo has anal warts"

Pretty Lady

So yesterday was a really fun day for me...
Spent about 6 hours at the cardiologist.

Highlights:
-I am now radioactive for 3 days. Seriously. I even get to carry around a card that says I am radioactive. Not sure why though- should I announce it at whatever store I go to? Hmmm never wore a straight-jacket before....

-before any of my tests even got started there was a "situation".
The nurse that was to put my IV line had one direct question before she could get started. Actually that isn't true- she had one direct question AFTER she put the IV in me. "Could you be pregnant"- now, I'm pretty sure that almost 99% of the patients there have no problem answering "no" to that question, as their eggs are withered and dried up. But of course, mine aren't (not that old yet 80sBand!)- so I answer "well I guess I could be"- SHE THEN PROCEEDS TO RIP THE IV OUT OF MY ARM "Well we can not do the test today"-
I get pretty angry at this point and she explains that she was going to inject me with radiation (so they could watch it go thru my heart) and that could kill my "baby"- Of course I'm not pregnant, which I told her. She said "well you said you could be"- and I'm all "well of course I could be, I have sex and no birth control is 100% effective"-
"Are you pregnant"
"No, I don't think so"
"Are you breastfeeding"
"What the FUCK is wrong with you"- ok so I didn't say that.

This went back and forth for quite a while, I even laughed at one point bc it was so crazy. At which point I got yelled at, THIS IS NOT FUNNY, THIS IS RADIATION!!!
okayyyyyyyyyyyyy

Anyhow somehow we got to common ground and back in went the IV line.

The rest of the visit was uneventful- had some treadmill tests, told everyone at the office that I cremated people- had some pictures taken of my heart- accidentally flashed a 90year old patient- good thing they have defibrillators in every room- yuck yuck.

And at the end, I got to leave with my very own holter monitor.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holter_monitor




I look so hot I'm surprised Bill let me out of his sight today.....

BIG SIGH.

The hands kill me!

Some say SNL sucks- sometimes I agree, however there have been times Bill and I have been hysterically laughing...

Here is one skit that made us laugh, a lot.

(it's a link to another blog that has the video)

http://akincarroll.blogspot.com/2008/10/funniest-thing-ive-ever-seen.html

Camping

I think Bill is going to write a detailed account of our camping trip.
I just wanted to mention that I (helped) skin a deer.
yep.
But I didn't eat any of it.

I will wait to read Bill's blog and then come back and fill any gaps in if I notice anything missing.

New favorite song

and I got to hear it twice!
I was so excited, I documented it...
(you can ask Bill, when I find a new song I like, I become OCD about changing radio stations until I find it...)

Cause you're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in then you're out
You're up then you're down
You're wrong when it's right
It's black and it's white
We fight, we break up
We kiss, we make up
(you)You don't really want to stay, no
(but you)But you don't really want to go-o
You're hot then you're cold
You're yes then you're no
You're in and you're out
You're up and you're down

First time!


Second time!